Golden Globe Predictions--Part Deux!

Ah, the Golden Globe Awards--the drunk cousin of the Academy Awards. I love the Globes because she's looser and a lot more fun than her golden counterpart, the Oscar. Celebrities get drunk and hosts Tina Fey and Amy Poehler provide us with a fun evening. Here's hoping that the Hollywood Foreign Press somehow wrangles them to emcee more awards shows. 

I'm much more obsessed with the Oscars, so I tend to be a lot more risky in my predictions for the Globes. My fellow AwardsDailyTV contributors and I predicted the television categories, and you can check them out here.

Best Picture - Drama - Part of me thinks that The Imitation Game will pull out a win here. The film is this big, looming threat, and, if it scores big somewhere, it will be at the Globes. But can Imitation win without a director nod? Selma could pull out a win here (especially if it wins Director), but Boyhood will probably continue its award dominance. 

Best Picture - Musical or Comedy - How great would it be if Pride pulled out a surprise here? A few days ago, it was reported that Into the Woods was named the winner of this category on the HFPA website, but can anything really beat Birdman? I think not. 

Best Director - Richard Linklater isn't the flashiest winner, so I think it comes down to Ava DuVernay for Selma or Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu for Birdman. Inarritu won this category years ago for Babel, but that was for the Drama category--directors don't usually win here for a film in the "comedy" category. If DuVernay pulls out a win here, she will be the first female director to win Director since Barbra Streisand in 1983 for Yentl. I've been going back and forth between these two, and I am going to go with Inarritu. Just barely. But who knows; Linklater could just win and blow my theory right out of the water.

Best Actor - Drama - With Michael Keaton competing in the Musical or Comedy category, it will be easy for Eddie Redmayne to win for his portrayal of Stephen Hawking in The Theory of Everything. The Actor category is going to be ridiculously fun to watch this year. 

Best Actress - Drama - Okay...I am saying this now. I think Julianne Moore will win for Still Alice BUT I will not be surprised if Jennifer Aniston takes it for Cake. Aniston is incredibly well liked, and Moore's votes could split between her other nomination (Actress in a Musical or Comedy for Maps to the Stars). I am emotionally prepared...I think...we shall see where the evening goes...breathe...breathe...

Best Actor - Musical or Comedy - No one is going to beat Michael Keaton. 

Best Actress - Musical or Comedy - It's interesting that Actor M/C is so tied up while this one is up for grabs. Clarence pointed out that the HFPA loved Maps to the Stars (something I didn't know), so I would accept Julianne Moore pulling a Kate Winslet as a late birthday present. The sun's not going to come out for Quvenzhane Wallis for Annie. Helen Mirren isn't going to take it for The Hundred-Foot Journey (I liked that movie a lot more than everyone else did). Are they going to give it to Emily Blunt for a movie that's more universally praised and awarded, or are they going to give it Amy Adams the second year in a row. Part of me says that if Adams can win for American Hustle, she can win for tying her shoes, but I have to go with Blunt. Put Adams' performance against just Blunt's "Moments in the Woods" and there's no contest in my eyes. 

Best Supporting Actor - J.K. Simmons will win for Whiplash. Cue the sound of me taking a shot. 

Best Supporting Actress - Here's my ballsy prediction of the day (that I will surely regret later). Meryl Streep edges out Patricia Arquette. Arquette has been winning nonstop for Boyhood, and I want her to win (she was nominated for 3 consecutive years for Medium). Streep has 8 other Globes, and she's great in front of a microphone. Do I think Streep has a win of winning the Oscar? No, but she might win here. 

Best Screenplay - Birdman. Is this starting to look like a sweep?

Best Animated Film - It should be The Boxtrolls, but it will be The Lego Movie.

Best Foreign Language Film - Ida has been winning everything, and I don't know jack. 

Best Original Score - That drum beat from Birdman is hard to forget, and it's ineligible for the Oscar. Look out for Theory of Everything or Gone Girl. 

Best Original Song - How the living hell could the HFPA leave "Lost Stars" off their nominees list?! It's the most heartbreaking number of the year, and it's not even nominated. It's going to be "Glory" by John Legend and Common, but if Lorde or Lana Del Rey wins, I might throw my television off the balcony.

Golden Globe Predictions--Part I!!!

I asked my ADTV pal, Clarence Moye, to predict the film categories for me. Check out his take on tonight's awards below!

It’s a fool’s errand to predict the Golden Globes.

First, the awards are given by the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, a body of international journalists who regard film and television through a completely different filter than traditional American audiences. Second, it’s widely reported that these journalists have varying degrees of credentials, some only posting enough output to just barely meet the criteria for membership.

Finally, the HFPA rarely like a sweep. They’re in it to largely spread the wealth among the assembled stars and studios to ensure attendance on their multi-million dollar telecast. 

So, putting all of that aside, here are my predications for tonight’s Golden Globe awards with brief justifications for each. I hold no esteem in my own predictions, largely going by gut feelings or things I’ve heard from other sources.

Take all of this with a massive grain of salt.

Best Motion Picture, Drama – Boyhood’s seemingly inevitable march to the Oscar podium feels like it will be repeated here, but I can’t decide if the persnickety Globes want to crown it first or if they want to go their own way. Two months ago, I thought The Imitation Game wins it in a cakewalk, but they didn’t nominate its director (Morten Tyldum, the worst name of a director ever in the history of film). If Selma had that screenplay nomination, then I would pick it – settling for second place here. Boyhood triumphs here again.

Best Motion Picture, Musical or Comedy – Birdman. Seven nominations in all the right places is a huge sign. It’s the closet thing we’ll have to a sweep all night.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture, Drama -  Eddie Redmayne wins here because it scores in all the right places for the HFPA: it’s showy, it’s a biopic, and he'll look great at the podium. This will be The Theory of Everything’s big (and possibly only) win of the evening.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture, Drama – Reportedly, the HFPA LOVES Maps to the Stars so I’m not so sure they’re going to award Julianne Moore here. They’ve done crazy things before (Sharon Stone over Susan Sarandon some 20 years ago rings a bell). I think they’re going with Jennifer Aniston (Cake) here, setting up some level of competition for Moore’s supposed engraved Oscar win. (Insert sound of Joey Moser crashing to the floor.)

Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture, Musical or Comedy – No one comes close to Michael Keaton in Birdman.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture, Musical or Comedy – Smart money has Emily Blunt for Into the Woods, perhaps that film’s only win. I’m thinking they will award Julianne Moore here for Maps to the Stars over her plainer performance in Still Alice. I don’t discount Moore’s possibility of winning both, though. Possible. Very, very possible.

Best Performance by a Supporting Actor in a Motion Picture – J.K. Simmons in Whiplash. Yawn, but good for him. This will be their tempo.

Best Performance by a Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture – Patricia Arquette wins here in another pre-ordained award. They do love them some Meryl Streep, though. Remember they awarded her for Adaptation over the “inevitable” Catherine Zeta-Jones for Chicago. 

Best Director – I don’t think Richard Linklater is flashy enough a director for the HFPA who historically pick the most directed films over the most subtly directed films. Instead, they’re going to go with Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu for Birdman.

Best Screenplay – Flip a coin. I’m thinking they’re going to award something here that likely won’t win another award. Is that The Imitation Game or Gone Girl? I’m going with Game.

Best Original Score – No idea here. I could see any one of these films winning with the exception of Interstellar because even the HFPA wouldn’t sink that low. Birdman isn’t eligible for the Oscar, and the two Brit biopics may cancel each other out (although Desplat probably has a leg up). I’m going out on a limb with Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross for Gone Girl.

Best Original Song – This category almost doesn’t matter because they omitted “Lost Stars” from Begin Again – a brilliantly orchestrated song that had to stand multiple versions within the film. I’m picking Selma’s “Glory” because my wife said it was good, and she’s smart people.

Best Animated Feature Film – The Lego Movie. I just fell asleep typing that.

Best Foreign Language Film – It’s between Ida and Leviathan, I suspect, just because those are the two films I’ve heard the most about in the last two months. After careful consideration (re: coin toss), I’m going with Ida.

For my television predictions, I’m (not giving it any more thought) sticking with my original predictions as posted on Awards Daily TV, a most excellent website that all of you should be reading.

If I may say so myself…

Are These Our Best Picture Nominees?

The Producers Guild announced their nominees for Best Picture this morning, and it was met with shocked reactions from both prognosticators and Oscar enthusiasts alike. Ava DuVernay's Martin Luther King Jr. film, Selma, failed to get screeners out to voters, and the film was left out of the ten slots. American Sniper, Clint Eastwood's tribute to Navy SEAL sniper Chris Kyle, is starting to gain momentum. 

Is it possible that Selma, the year's best reviewed film, will be left out of this year's biggest awards race? I doubt it. Twitter was set ablaze by the omission, but that doesn't mean that where wasn't anything to celebrate this morning. David Fincher's Gone Girl is starting to appear on critics' lists and it's a huge hit. I think it's in. Why are some people discounting Grand Budapest when it's been showing up everywhere? 

The full list of nominees is as follows:

American Sniper

Birdman

Boyhood

Foxcatcher

Gone Girl

The Grand Budapest Hotel

The Imitation Game 

Nightcrawler

The Theory of Everything

Whiplash

Could something else sneak into the Oscar Best Picture race? I thought Into the Woods stood a chance to get nominated if it landed here at the PGA, but it seems like the Rob Marshall musical is toast when it comes to the awards season (you know, other than technical categories). Will JC Chandor's A Most Violent Year be the first film since Quills to be named Best Picture by the National Board of Review and not get nominated for the top prize? This list looks pretty solid, but in a year like this (i.e., all over the place), anything can happen. 

What's That Smell? Oh, the Five Shittiest Movies of the Year

The tree is trimmed...the presents are wrapped...and the eggnog is poured. It's the end of the year, and the top ten lists of 2014 are trickling online, but my personal list isn't ready yet (so many movies left to see!). The present you can open early this evening is my list of the five worst movies of the year. And, no, Winter's Tale didn't make the cut. Sure, it is probably the worst thing to come out of 2014, but it's so weird and stupid that a drinking game can be devised. 

5. Magic in the Moonlight

Woody Allen always gets a pass from me, but not this time. Magic in the Moonlight is the costume comedy cousin of Midnight in Paris that you don't want to invite to your party. Allen's casting of Emma Stone feels misguided, and she has more chemistry dead as Gwen Stacy from Spider-Man 2 than she does with Colin Firth. It's forced, boring and bland.

4. That Awkward Moment

Oh, you like that picture of Zac Efron atop a toilet with his muscled bum bared? Of course you do. The only good thing that came out of That Awkward Moment was Troy Bolten Efron showing off his ass in this male-driven romantic comedy. If they showed this image in a movie theater for 2 hours, I'd pay for it, but I definitely wouldn't again sit through the nagging tale of 3 brahs too embarrassed to admit they are all in relationships. Really, guys? Plus, Neighbors (which came out 2 months later) upped the hot Efron quotient a lot better.

3. Men Women and Children

Jason Reitman's cell phone cautionary tale features enough characters that everyone can see themselves in someone. Those same characters, however, aren't fully fleshed out, and the end result is so melodramatic that none of it seems real. Swipe left. 

2. The Other Woman

The Other Woman legitimately gives me a headache. Initially, it appeared that we would have a First Wives Club 2.0 on our hands. Cameron Diaz and Leslie Mann are comic pros, so this women-get-even-on-the-cheating-sleaze looked like a light, care free good time. This movie is a mess, and that's coming from a guy that appreciates cinematic messes. It's not funny, poorly written, and shockingly dated. 

1. Let's Be Cops

Let's not, shall we?

'Whiplash' Wiped Me Out

There is a lot of talk about "the next great..." something in Whiplash, the feature directorial debut of Damien Chazelle. Miles Teller's music student incessantly listens to recordings of Buddy Rich and aspires to have a career like the famous drummer. In the hunt for creative catharsis, young artists look for approval from their mentors and peers. One thing is for sure: I'm sure glad I decided to go into choir instead of band in high school.

Teller's Andrew Nieman feels like his life is falling into place. He's been accepted to Shaffer Conservatory, and he finally musters up the courage to ask out the pretty girl who works at the concession stand at a nearby small theater. His earnestness is given a reality check when he's invited to play as an alternate in Terence Fletcher's award-winning jazz ensemble. Fletcher is played by the great J. K. Simmons, and, sadly, his performance was the only thing I liked about Whiplash. 

The biggest problem that I had about Whiplash was that Simmons' character never felt real to me--ever. You're telling that this award-winning band director at the most prestigious music school in the country doesn't have a reputation for bullying his students beyond recognition? Not just bullying. Neiman's first session as an alternate under Fletcher's direction ends with furniture being thrown and Fletcher slapping Neiman across the face repeatedly. Tone it down, guys, tone it down. 

In Andrew's quest for artistic breakthrough, he leaves a lot behind. He quickly breaks it off with the girl from the movie theater, and stops hanging out with his dad (Paul Reiser). The more Fletcher tries to break him, the harder he pushes back. In one shocking scene, Andrew leaves his music behind, and he rushes back to get it, resulting in an accident that made me jump in my chair. 

Is his obsession with becoming one of the greats just a product of him butting heads with Fletcher? He becomes so petulant angry, and self-righteous that it was hard for me to root for him. It quickly became the story of two pricks trying to finish first in an abusive measuring contest. It's appreciated that Simmons didn't make Fletcher one of those teachers trying to "teach a lesson," but it just spirals too out of control. Fletcher is fleshed out by Simmons' ferocious performance (seriously, he's terrifying), but it wouldn't have worked without such a seasoned actor. Teller isn't an actor that I personally respond to, and his performance (while spectacular in energy) didn't make me like him any more. 

There is a scene where Andrew practices so hard that his fingers start to bleed. That's how I felt after watching Whiplash. All the blood was drained out of me, and it was only going to get wiped up by a poor janitor who isn't paid enough. 

Well, This Crappy 'L5Y' Poster Came Out...

This poster for The Last Five Years certainly isn't terrible, but it's just kind of boring and too clean. I get they are going for a photo album/surrounded by memories theme, but it feels overly familiar. Oh, and I wish the tagline was "There are two sides to every marriage" instead of "love story." Then again, they could have gone with this...

Blech. 

Fifty Shades of Suck: The Color of Idiocy

Megan and I recorded this episode of Fifty Shades of Suck, but I forgot to post it! What does that say about this series?! 

Chapter 10 is the shortest chapter of the entire book (maybe of the series so far), and that's a relief since it's pretty unbearable. Not very much happens except EL James tries to make billiards sexy. All she does is mention Christian look at Ana's ass as she bends over to play, and lots of balls are mentioned. So sexy, right? I would much rather watch this scene play out with Tom Cruise and Paul Newman from The Color of Money. 

Megan introduces me to a movie coming out at the same time as Fifty Shades. Entitled Old Fashioned, this love story is about a man and a woman who meet and, I guess, kind of date. I think it's aiming to be an antidote to the sexuality of Fifty Shades, but it's probably more insulting with its overbearing chastity. Man, it looks horrid. Cue it up and watch it with us!

If you are new to Fifty Shades of Suck, my best gal pal Megan and I meet up every week to read a chapter from the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy, but we provide our own snarky commentary.  Last year, we subjected ourselves to the first book, and now we are chugging right along through the first sequel, Fifty Shades Darker.  If you would like to play catch up, the first set of podcasts are available here, and Fifty Shades Darker chapters are available below.  We hope you enjoy, and share them with your friends!!!

Chapter 9

Chapter 8

Chapter 7

Chapter 6

Chapter 5

Chapter 4

Chapter 3

Chapter 2

Chapter 1