Monday, March 11, 2013

Catching Fire Portraits: The Deadliest Senior Pictures This Side of Panem


Images are starting to be released for the second chapter in The Hunger Games trilogy, Catching Fire.  I refuse to call this The Hunger Games: Catching Fire, because people know what Catching Fire is.  It's too similar to calling the Twilight series "a saga."  Gimme a break.  Along with the picture above, Lionsgate put out a minimalist teaser poster to tie in with the sequel's Victory Tour subplot.

Yup...that's it...

The studio slowly churned out "character portraits" of the main characters, and I feel like I should take my senior pictures over again with the exact same backdrop.


I kind of wish that Jennifer Lawrence wore this dress to the Oscars.  Every time I see a picture of Elizabeth Banks as Effie, I start craving carnival cotten candy. 


Peeta and Gale should be featured on the deadliest season of The Bachelorette.  I would think there would be more hubbub over these young men's latest controversies (Josh Hutcherson allegedly smoking pot and Liam Hemsworth allegedly cheating on his fiancee Miley Cyrus), but these two guys are so dashing it's hard not to get lost...in...whaaat...soooo dreaaamy...


The two casting decisions I couldn't get behind were Jena Malone as Johanna Mason and Sam Clafin as Finnick Odair.  I have never liked Malone in anything, and I think it stems from her bratty turn in Stepmom.  Yes, I don't like an actress because I didn't like her in a role that she played when she was about twelve years old.  You know that moment in Stepmom where Susan Sarandon tells her kids that she has cancer, and Malone storms out of the room?  Her father, Ed Harris, yells at her:

Ed Harris: Anna!  You do not run out on your mother!

Whiny, Stupid Jena Malone: NO, THAT'S YOUR JOB!!!

I just can't.  I have been annoyed by her since 1998, and it's going to be really hard for me to enjoy her now.  I should hate the direction and screenplay and not Malone, but my irrational hatred is too pronounced.

I hate you I hate you I hate you...

I don't like Clafin (who is adequately handsome) as much as I like Armie Hammer, who was also up for the role.  Finnick Odair is cocky and gorgeous, and, while I am sure Clafin will do a good job, I would prefer to see Armie Hammer shirtless and stressed out over surviving The Quarter Quell. 

What could have been...sigh...


I am most excited, however, for Jeffrey Wright as Beetee.   


Jeffrey frickin' Wright.  He is one of the most dependable and underrated character actors working today, so I am glad that he will get some more notice in such a blockbuster.  You've seen it.  You just don't realize it. 

I sure wouldn't mind sitting down for a portrait of my own, but I feel like these are silly.  I love character posters, but I think that some more images from the movie might excite me more.  Catching Fire is actually my favorite book of the trilogy, so I am really anxious for this entry.  Do these posters excite or concern anyone? 

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